Ricky was a young man in his late twenties with a very checkered past. Having been in trouble with the authorities since his early teens, addiction, robbery, violence, and some lesser crimes were all a part of Ricky’s resume.

His tales of childhood abuse and neglect made it easy to understand his life choices. Ricky was a three-time loser, a victim of self-destructive behavior, with a future that appeared bleak and foreboding. Without a significant change in outlook and conduct, his destiny included a life of misery, a continuous mad dash to escape the law, and possibly an early encounter with death.

Eventually, Ricky’s addiction so scrambled his life that he ended up homeless and on the streets without any friends or family to turn to for help. When he heard about our program, Ricky called me to see if he could join.

Our faith-based, one-year program was designed to help a man get his life back on track and become a productive member of society. Out of options, Ricky agreed to join the program and abide by its rules and restrictions.

The next thirty days were anything but easy for Ricky. His underlying code of conduct was conflict and rebellion–it was somewhat of a miracle that he lasted as long as he did. On his thirtieth day, Ricky informed me that he was leaving. “I’ve been clean from drugs for thirty days. Thirty days is the longest I have been clean since I started using drugs in my early teens. I’m cured.”

He left the program that afternoon, and we never saw Ricky again. The last we heard of him was that the police wanted him for armed robbery.

It is easy to criticize Ricky for not devoting enough time to allowing the changes in his life to take hold. He should have known that a lifetime of lousy thinking was not reversible in just a few short weeks.

Unfortunately, in his eagerness to get on with the rest of his life, Ricky neglected to lay a solid foundation that would see him through the temptations and troubles that are a part of every man or woman’s life. He did not prepare himself for the responsibilities that come with freedom. Although there were some changes in Ricky’s outward behavior, he was still the same man inside. Once he left our place, he could not navigate the struggles of a drug-free environment.

In a sense, the process of becoming like Christ is waiting and not quitting, practicing a disciplined life of prayer and meditation on God’s Word despite our seeming lack of progress. The only way to reverse our rebellion against God and ourselves is to embark on a schedule of consistent daily discipline over an extended period. It does not happen overnight.

If you are like most people, you are always in a hurry, desperate for God to get the job done as quickly as possible. He will get the job done. Quickly, though, is from God’s perspective and not your own. Despite all your objections, pleading, and impatience, God doesn’t hurry. He spent forty years training Moses for the supreme mission of his life. Are you better than Moses?

A changed life is the fruit of a long-term daily relationship with God. Busy people find comfort in the oft-repeated cliché that quality time is more important than the quantity of time spent with someone. Perhaps that explains why so many fail to experience deep and meaningful relationships.

Time is one of God’s primary tools for healing and transforming the damage you or others have done to your life. He looks at your life from the perspective of eternity, always mindful of your need for preparation and seasoning before launching you on your life mission. In other words, to be God’s man or woman requires being equipped and prepared for life’s hardships, both in time and circumstance.

Moses, a prince of Egypt, spent forty years in the desert caring for his father-in-law’s sheep before he was ready to meet his destiny. David’s preparation for becoming the king of Israel included living life on the run, in exile, and in fear for his life, continually plagued by memories of prophecies unfulfilled. Paul, the man on fire for God, endured three years in the Arabian Desert and years of exile in Tarsus before Barnabas brought him to Antioch to work among the new followers of Christ. Still, he needed several years of seasoning before the church launched him on his first missionary journey. No matter the situation, Paul knew that God was working to accomplish his will in his life.

For each of these men, the transformation in their lives did not occur in the twinkling of an eye. A change of direction can happen in a moment, but overhauling a person’s character takes time. Conversion dramatically shifts our worldview and perspective, but only time can season our thinking and character.

Over time, God uses the events and happenings of your life to paint a picture of Christ in your personality and character. As you experience the trials of discouragement and the ordinary tasks of everyday life, it may feel like God has deserted you. Your pain may cause you to become impatient and look for shortcuts and easier methods. It may seem like life has conspired against you to prevent you from achieving your cherished ambitions and goals. Despite your feelings, God is busy accomplishing his will in the center of your pain.

When Jesus was on the cross, the mass of humanity was oblivious to his misery and agony. Even worse, a close companion betrayed him, and most of his dearest friends and confidants deserted him. More disheartening still, from the dark pit of the cross, shrouded in waves of loneliness, he cried out, “My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?” (Mark 15:34b, KJV) On the cross, he was all alone. As life slowly ebbed from his tortured body, each moment must have seemed like an eternity, a cruel reminder of God’s desertion.

Still, moments before he died, drained from his struggle with death, “And when Jesus had cried with a loud voice, he said, Father, into thy hands I commend my spirit” (Luke 23:46, KJV). With his final breath, his last words were an affirmation of trust. Despite all the evidence to the contrary, Jesus still believed that his Father loved him and that his future was secure in his hands.

Time is the incubator of your faith in God, the essential ingredient for change. It trains you to continue trusting God and to believe he is at work in your life despite the lack of outward evidence. In a sense, the slow-moving nature of the Spirit of God exercises your spiritual muscles, increasing your faith as you persevere over time and continue to believe and trust.

For years, whenever I attempted to make beef stew in a pot on the stove, the meat was always tough and gnarly, almost unfit to eat. Then, I tried slowly cooking the stew in a crockpot on low heat for about ten hours. I could cut the meat with a fork. It took longer to cook in the crockpot, but it tasted better than the stew cooked at a raging boil on the stovetop. Your walk with God is like cooking food in a slow cooker, which brings out the distinctness and flavor of each ingredient.

Significant spiritual growth does not occur instantly, as if by magic. Over an extended period, your life simmers in the heat of God’s Word, in the events and circumstances that make up your life, and in the loving action of the Holy Spirit, transforming you into a picture of Christlikeness, giving you a life of decency and influence.

TIME SPENT WITH GOD MAKES YOU MORE LIKE HIM

When my wife and I first married, the gap between our similarities and differences was wide. I was serious about everything. I also had convictions about everything, such as what brand of dishwashing liquid we should use and where to locate the spices and canned goods. Tammy was serious-minded about essential things but did not sweat the small stuff. Moreover, she loved to laugh and have fun.

Over time, we have become more alike. I have learned to laugh and not take myself so seriously. I am better for my years with Tammy; my relationship with her has changed me.

A relationship has the power to change you, sometimes for your benefit and sometimes to your detriment. Tammy is a positive force for change in my life. I love spending time–a lot of time–with her. The amount of time I spend with her is a reliable indicator of the value I place on our relationship. If I were constantly too busy to spend time with her, she could correctly conclude that our relationship was a low priority in my life.

If you are serious about changing your life, you must dedicate significant time to deepening your relationship with God. Never forget that God is working in your life in the same way he worked in the lives of Moses, David, and Paul. God took a long time to do his work in their lives, and it will also take time to accomplish his purpose for you. Please do not surrender to discouragement and disappointment. Remember what Paul said in Romans 8:22-25 (KJV):

“For we know that the whole creation groaneth and travaileth in pain together until now. And not only they but ourselves also, which have the first fruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, waiting for the adoption, to wit, the redemption of our body. For we are saved by hope: but hope that is seen is not hope: for what a man seeth, why doth he yet hope for? But if we hope for that we see not, then do we with patience wait for it.”

It will take time to build a foundation in your life that can withstand the chaos of daily living. Time—or waiting–is the process that God uses to strengthen you for living a consequential life. Continue to have hope for what God is doing in your life. Time is your friend and not your enemy. He is working!